I returned to the scene of the crime. 2497 Halstead Drive. A feeling of dread consumed me as I stared at Derrick’s car in the driveway. I was never good with confrontation. The ball was in my court, but I didn’t know what to do with it. After sitting in the driveway for almost an hour, I decided it was time to face my demons.
With bags in tow, I didn’t spend any time looking for Derrick. I headed straight for the bedroom. The California king sized bed was made with fresh linen and showed no signs of the infidelity committed by my husband. A tear formed and I quickly brushed it away. I had already done enough of that. Derrick was somewhere in the house and the last thing I wanted was for him to find me crying. I wanted him to feel my pain. I wanted him to suffer. I wanted him to pay. My clothes and toiletries were back in their place and I tucked my luggage in the closet. Still no sign of Derrick. I stood directly in front of our bed looking for something, anything. All that remained were the memories of what I witnessed.
The door cracked. The candles lit. The sickening aroma of lust lingering in the air. The sheets pulled taut with another woman’s hands. Derrick sliding in and out, in and out, in and out of this stranger. Anonymous screams echoed in my head.
I allowed that tear to fall. Pain was pain and faking it only made matters worse. Derrick managed to make me feel like a stranger in my own home. No amount of apologies could rectify the damage he inflicted. Just as I was about to burst into the spontaneous tears that crippled me, his deep voice interrupted.
“Roya, you came back.” A guilty and run down excuse for the usual Derrick was standing in the doorway. Wearing a wife-beater and his chill jeans, he looked unkempt and grubby. The evidence of regret and distress was visible on his stubbly face. He was definitely at his worst.
I glanced at him long enough to become nauseous and returned my gaze to the bed. If this was his half-hearted attempt to make me feel sorry for him, he was mistaken.
He quickly entertained the thought of how Alicia got her to leave at all. Derrick was not used to this side of her. Looking angrier than she had ever been, he was unsure that his plan would hold up. She did come home though. All he had to do was keep her there. The script he prepared for her return had dissipated. Small talk was the best he could muster.
“How you been? I’ve really missed you.”
I turned and looked through him. He knew where I was staying and if he cared anything about me, he wouldn’t be in this position.
The look on her face was a mixture of rage, sadness, and utter disappointment. She played ping-pong with her eyes and back and forth between him and the bed. In a voice that was barely audible and purely evil, she asked, “So who is she?”
Derrick tucked his thumbs into the front pocket of his jeans. Looking everywhere but directly at his wife, he replied, “She’s nobody. I swear to you baby it meant nothing.”
Derrick was fluent in English and BS. She may have let his lies slide in the past, but it was a new day. Her cold stare cut through his core. Derrick was glad that he hadn’t fully entered the room. He would never admit it, but the look scared the **** out of him.
“No Derrick, I meant nothing.” The statement deserved a pause. “You brought another woman into our home, our bed. How are we supposed to move on from this? I want to know who the **** she is! Who is this person you feel so comfortable with bringing up in here?”
Derrick scratched the designated spot on the back of his neck reserved for lies. He would not answer that last question. There was no need to involve names. Soroya already had enough ammunition.
“Baby, I messed up. I wasn’t thinking. I promise I will never hurt you again. I thought you were going to leave me.”
My anger escalated as I addressed my husband. “I’ll be damned if you are going to disrespect me and get the satisfaction of freedom.” Through my anger, I found a sense of power. It was time to get what I wanted for a change.
“I’m sick of your **** Derrick. Your promises don’t mean anything without proof. You will not touch me until you get tested for EVERYTHING, we will get a new bed, and we are signing up for counseling next week.”
Derrick put his hands up in peaceful protest. The other requests were doable, but counseling was a fate worse than death.
“Babe, we don’t have to take it that far. We can work it out. We can get through this.”
Moving closer to me, I backed away in disgust. He had pushed me too far and it would take more than a few words to console me.
“Maybe I wasn’t clear, but this isn’t optional. This is my marriage too and I deserve respect. You will stay away from that ***** and anybody else that you are messing with behind my back. We will get through this because this is MY home and I am YOUR wife. Don’t you ever forget that.” I brushed past Derrick and left him to think about his actions.
After the conversation in the room that started it all, Derrick realized that his betrayal created a rift that he couldn’t easily bridge. Even after fulfilling Soroya’s demands, their relationship was still strained. Derrick lived in constant confusion, which was new to him. Soroya continued to cook and clean, but she completely withdrew otherwise. The only time she would speak was during their counseling sessions and sex was out of the question. She refused to sleep in the same room with him even after their old bed was replaced and Derrick was given a clean bill of health.
Pretty soon, an entire month had passed with less than a few sentences shared between them. Derrick needed the old Soroya back. Not being in control was too much work. He returned to the days where he showered Soroya with everything her heart desired. Derrick spent countless amounts on apology cards, flowers, jewelry, and gifts. The most recent gift was an engraved Tiffany’s tennis bracelet. He was sure that one would steal her heart, but she barely mumbled thank you. With every token, he believed that he was paying his way out of his indiscretion.
Soroya saw through his attempts because she knew they were short lived. Her possession of the control was temporary until he decided to take it back. Every day was a ticking time bomb with no detonation in sight. Derrick would act and play whatever role in order to make her stay. What she didn’t know was the curtain was about to fall.
