Think I Better Let It Go...

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

This evening revealed a lot of things to me about a situation I've been going through for the past two months.  I offered my kindness, and money, to a person I thought was trustworthy.  In light of a lot of negative situations that have plagued me this year, I thought I was smooth sailing.  However, just when things started to go well, BAM, this happens.  There are so many questions I have floating around in my head about why they would hurt me like this.  I mean, what did I ever do to deserve such ignorance and evilness?  My face is damp from crying and that heavy feeling of pain and betrayal has consumed me.  I truly hate feeling used and foolish for even playing a part in it.

Like I wrote about in my last post, it's usually the people you know that hurt you the most.  It still baffles me that I forget this ago old wisdom.  I refuse to become the type of woman that lets every eye-opening situation cause me to close my heart to others.  My REAL support system is still in place and they are on their job.  I was ready to take action against the injustice committed by my "friend".  Then the interjection of some good and timely advice from my loved ones convinced me that I'm better off allowing things to work themselves out.  There will always be people out there without my goodness and kind hearted spirit.  Sometimes I will come across/discover them in my life.  This doesn't mean that I should become a bitch and stoop to their level.  What it does mean is that I be myself and have the wisdom to know the difference.  

Deep down, I would like to say that this will never happen again.  That's unrealistic even on a good day!  I will be hurt again, but hopefully I can come out stronger each time and continue to give people my best even though I may not get it in return.  I will not change nor will I lose the positive attributes that make me Eboni.  I thank God for all the good people in my life and will pray for the ones who are not.  I did not want to let this situation go, but for the time being and for my sanity, things must be released.  Who am I to say I trust Him when I won't even pass over the armor and let Him fight this one for me?  So I'm deciding tonight to relinquish the burden which is hindering my progress, leave pride behind and do what's best for me. 

Thanks to all the genuine and positive people in my life.  You know who you are and this journey would be a hot mess without you!  Until next time my loves...