“Marriage is a lottery, but you can’t tear up your ticket if you lose.”
~Unknown
Says who?! With many of the married couples I know, there seems to be a lot of contemplation about and/or tearing up of their ticket! What used to be a one-way street into a lifetime of happiness, struggles and unity is now a super highway with the option to exit at every half mile! How many couples do you know that entered marriage thinking, “We are going to give it a try and see what happens. If it doesn’t work, we will just break it off.”? This type of thinking used to be reserved for the daters, but now many are preparing for the absolute worst in a situation that SHOULD bring out your best. If you are looking for all your exits before you even merge lives, is marriage really the option? Then there are those who stay and still want to play! Hay dios mio! Does marriage mean anything anymore?! 
I’m really starting to believe it doesn’t for a lot of people. Returning to this “exit strategy” thing, I find myself disgusted when I hear married couples plotting their demise. Knowing the location of your exit(s) is critical on planes, at parties, on the tenth floor of a building and a slew of other places, but not marriage! There seems to be a lot of invisible fine print that goes along with a lot of today’s unions. Before many people drudgingly stroll down the aisle, they have already developed this fine print with their friends, family and anyone else who will listen. These stipulations are placed on people without them even getting a chance to defend, or work on their faults. No wonder the divorce rate is soaring! My thought is this: “If you are having doubts, it may be the wrong route!” Now on to those cheaters and flip-floppers… 
Having a change of heart is cool when you are still single and free to mingle, but having a fixed heart is what marriage is all about. Marriage should be entered into with readiness, reverence and fear. For many, the fear factor isn’t based on what goes into the union, but more what will be missed. Many people aren’t marrying their best friend. Instead, they are settling for their work in progress, their ATM, their doorstop, or their fantasy. When these people fall short of their lofty and unrealistic expectations, they are ready to test the waters and see what else is out there. Or even better yet, come back to the person they “should have” married to keep their options open. While dipping their toes in other pools, many don’t think of—nor care about—the repercussions of their actions. Catch a program on Investigation Discovery, episode of Cheaters or Snapped and see what type of repercussions I’m talking about! With all this drama, why not just stay single? 
Something new will always be appealing, but once you get married you should stand by that decision unless there is a damn good reason to walk away. Questioning your choice AFTER saying your vows is a complete waste of time, money, energy and emotions. In a world where you don’t even have to leave your house to get a date, we have way too much access to falter and fail. However, we still have a choice to make the right decision and do the right thing. The choice to marry someone should be so full of certainty that no one or nothing can make you change your mind six days, six months, or even sixty years later. I will leave you with this…
1 comments:
Tolstoy hits the nail on the head! Some are not only looking for their doorstop, they are looking for a doormat.
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